Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Time Saving Concept

Have you ever heard of the concept of saving time? Well, it does exist. On a daily basis we hear of these citizens who have accomplished just this. You might save some time by taking a few shortcuts to work.
Then you might ask - when can you use the time you have saved? If you have saved 2 hours over the past week. Do you then have 2 hours to spare? This concept is going to sky rocket one day. I'm telling you. One day when walking down the streets you might hear from homeless person,"Can you spare some time mister?". You might as well just start saving up right now. Like many of you readers are thinking now. "Maybe he is right. I should save some time".
The really great thing about the time saving concept is when you die. You get to heaven. Or if you are a Bush fan you go to Hell.
Either way. You can just go,"Nope, not to day mine imaginary friend. I've saved time, 36 hours. Fuck you.".
That's how it went with Jesus. He died. Went to heaven. Told the ol'man off, "Yo pops. I got time to spare. Me and my homies are going to a party. You dig?".
God:"I dig".

Friday, January 27, 2006

Can You Spare Some Time?

I'm so lucky. Today I saved some time. I took some shortcuts to work. Plus I ate my breakfast and lunch at the same time. I saved 3 hours 12 minutes and 32 seconds. So I got time to spare. I do not know what to do with it yet. I'm lucky that way. If I die. I can just say to the imaginary guy upstairs (God). "Hey, you can't do this to me now. I have saved time. 3 hours 12 minutes and 32 seconds". That's where resurrection comes in. I guess that is what Viagra is for the cock. Shit that's what they should call it. Resurre(r)ction.
Grandpa can have wood again. There is granny going."Shit. You pancake head. It has reserrected, and I thought the war was over". Granpda would be on granny like shit on velcro.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Dane Cook



The all so funny Dane Cook.

Sunday, January 08, 2006

WorkWorkWork!



Oh I'm tired. I'm tired of everything. Specially my job. I feel that I don't get enough sleep. For a while I have blamed it on low blood pressure, lack of vitamins and little exercise. Now I have found the main cause of this. Too much work!

The population in Norway is about 4 million people. Yeah a small country. But if you piss us off you will have the UN chasing after you. Which wont be a long chase. Like I said, 4 million people. 1,4 million of these people are retired. That means the remaining 2,6 million people have to do all the work. 1 million are going to school. The remaining 1,6 million have to do all the work.

Of the remaining 1,6 million people, 1 million works for the government. Which means 600.000 are left to do all the work.

Out of the 600.000, 300.000 are in the military. That means there are 300.000 left. Out of the 300.000, 250.000 are homeless living on the street. Which means there are only 50.000 doing all the work. Subtract those 40.000 who are in hospital, than you only have 10.000 left.

Off course you have 9.999 people in jail. Which means I'm the only one doing all the goddamn work in this country. What can I say. It sickens me.