Ramble on

Ever since I started this blog I feel pressured to write something everyday.
Today I don't know what to write about. This is also known as filler, just like many of the other posts.

Do you know why the moose died after falling off a cliff?
Because a cow sat on it.

Do you know what a deer says right before it is hit by a car?
C'mon, give it your best shot.

There are hidden messages in everything.
When you get a bottle of perfume as a gift, that is just so evil. The hidden message here kids is, you stink.

The other day, a friend of mine offered me gum and that pissed me off. He did it right in front of everybody too. Why not just take a knife and stab me. If his breath doesn't smell like a meadow, I don't broadcast it like a tornado warning.

When someone holds the door for you. By that, they mean you are retarded. It means that you are incapable of doing it your self.

Things not to say while in a public bathroom:
* You need help with that?
* I could really use some help right now.
* What's that ridiculous looking piece of flesh?
* Nice
* Hello everybody
* Wanna see a trick?
* I can make mine look like a burger

End of ramble.